- I'm a ridiculous idealist.
- I'm a people pleaser.
- I tend to avoid sharing the tough spots in my life.
I noticed, while looking over my blog, that it may come across like I'm perfect and do everything right in this life. One thing I hate (yes, I said hate) is when we lift up the pastor to think that he/she is flawless, perfect, and makes no mistakes. This does two nasty things.
- Gives the non-clergy the feeling that there's no way they can approach the pastor.
- Sets up the pastor for guaranteed failure.
In the interest of full disclosure:
- Sometimes I feel a great husband; Sometimes I feel like a great Youth Pastor; Rarely, if ever have I felt like both at the same time.
- I significantly question my effectiveness and calling at least weekly.
- More often I find myself asking "Am I making a difference?" than saying "I am making a difference."
- I have diabetes, and do an extremely poor job at taking care of myself.
- I am at least 25 pounds overweight.
- I am terrible at returning calls, and following up on conversations.
- I'm very sloppy and disorganized when it comes to keeping space clean (come visit my office some time).
- I am notorious for walking off on someone in the middle of a conversation.
- I'm a major gossip.
- My wife and I have been trying to have a baby for over 4 years now. We have run the tests, and everything seems fine. I often wonder if God has forgotten about me, or if he's punishing me for past mistakes. I've given up hope for a baby on more than one occasion.
- When I'm on my own processing my life, there's been times I've found myself unintentionally verbally saying, "I suck as a Christian!"
- I often think that it's only a matter of time until someone finds me out to be the phony that I'm afraid I might be.
- I'm normal, and so are you.