Friday 5 + 10 years: Heartbreaks

5 major Heartbreaks I've dealt with in the 10 years I've been Youth Pastor:

1. Facebook Photo Albums: They graduate and move on. I pull open a facebook album and see the red cup, the pasty eyes. Or I see the scantily clad Spring Break photos with captions like "I kind of remember that night" or "I'm glad I brought protection".
2. The Voicemail: I returned from India to get a voicemail from a "concerned parent" who was upset over something very miniscule. The voicemail proceeded to last about 2 1/2 minutes as I found out where our priorities were out of whack, why nobody wants to come to our youth group, and why they changed churches. Voice mail done. No name, no way to really figure out who it is. The heartbreak wasn't that I felt like a failure, the heartbreak was that this mom had so missed the point.
   
3. The Attendance Roster: We'll regularly sit down and clean out our attendance rosters of students who no longer attend. We remove way too many who've decided they don't have time for a Church body to tie into.
4. The Parents Who Chose the Broom: This one has played out multiple ways at multiple times. The girl who started having sex with her boyfriend. They guy caught at the party and facing a sports supsension. The girl talking to mom and dad about getting molested as a child. Mom or Dad, or even Mom and Dad decide it be best to just do everything to keep it quiet over dealing with the situation at hand. Image trumps efforts toward restoration. Grab the broom and brush under the rug.
5. Chris: He was an 8th grade student when I first got here. I remember I had a real desire to see him connect with God. The last time I talked to Chris was his Senior year, and he was all excited about moving to Indianapolis with his brother and earning a bunch of money. 3 months later, he was brutally murdered in a drug deal gone wrong. It was the first funeral I ever did.

Why would I start with this? Because ministry is filled with disappointment and heartbreak. It's a reality you face. It can easily be taken personally, but as I told a group of Bethel students two weeks ago, the only disappointments and heartbreaks you should take personally are your personal failures. The others are outside your control.
They still hurt, but I'm grateful I've got the Almighty Creator as a partner in this thing.